


A Funalis Prayer

by EradiKate



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fic or Treat 2019, Grief/Mourning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2021-01-05 04:21:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21207308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EradiKate/pseuds/EradiKate
Summary: Hawke faces Funalis after fleeing Kirkwall.  Fenris reminds her that she isn't alone in her grief.A gift for Fic or Treat 2019.





	A Funalis Prayer

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KieraRutherford](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KieraRutherford/gifts).

The list was almost a prayer, a plea to the Maker on worn parchment. The names at the top were faded, written carefully and evenly spaced. As it went on, the ink grew darker, the penmanship sharper and more cramped. In one place, it was smudged what he suspected was blood. He recognized most of the names. “Father” topped the list, “Bethany” just underneath it. Further down there was “Carver,” “Bartrand,” and “Mother.” The last two were almost illegible, but Fenris knew they were “Elthina” and “Orsino.”

Hawke’s pen had fallen from her grip, a splotch of black staining the scarred wooden tabletop. Two candles guttered fitfully, threatening to burn out, as the woman slumped on the table clearly had. Even though she slept, she wasn’t at rest. The lines around her eyes deepened, her jaw clenched, some dream haunting her.

“Hawke,” Fenris said softly. “Hawke, wake up. It’s okay.”

Her hands shook as she opened her eyes, exhaustion still clinging to her features. “What did you say?” 

“I said it’s okay,” Fenris replied, smoothing her hair back from her forehead as she sat up. “You looked like you were having a bad dream. Do you want to talk about it?”

Hawke yawned. “They’ve all been bad recently. I keep dreaming about my family...well, I’ve told you about those.” She rubbed at the spot of ink on the tabletop and frowned. “Oops.”

“Salt and vinegar,” Fenris muttered. “Though I doubt anyone will notice.”

“I had a letter from Aveline today,” Hawke said, now frowning at the wax dripping down the candles. “She said that Varric’s left Kirkwall.”

He wasn’t surprised by that news. “Was that all?” 

Hawke heard the more complicated question behind the words. “She mentioned that nobody was sure what to do about Funalis, and it just reminded me...I haven’t really observed it. Not in any meaningful way. Not since…”

_Not since I couldn’t save my mother._ She didn’t need to say the words, Fenris knew that she hadn’t willingly set foot in a Chantry since Leandra’s funeral. He’d seen her turn Sebastian away with harsh words and dry eyes, then seen her retreat further into herself as the city fell apart around them.

“If that is what you want, we can find a Chantry. They will be overwhelmed now and unlikely to recognize you, if that worries you.”

Hawke looked directly at him for the first time since waking, her eyes still dulled by the nightmares. “You really mean that, don’t you?”

He blinked in surprise. “Of course. I would do anything to make this easier for you.”

A hint of a smile touched her lips. “Thank you. But I would feel a hypocrite in a Chantry. Andraste’s ashes...it’s a celebration of her death. In fire. Like so many in Kirkwall. And it was my fault.”

_Because I didn’t stop Anders._ They’d had this conversation as well. Try as he might, Fenris could never quite convince her that the mage had made his own choices and that she was only carrying his guilt.

“We could do something I saw once, while I was in Seheron. At dusk, the natives would dress as spirits and walk the streets in remembrance.” Fenris caught the skeptical look on Hawke’s face. “Or not.”

“I appreciate the suggestion.” Fenris snorted. “Really! We’re trying to keep a low profile. Maybe after they’ve had this Conclave that Varric’s gone off to, we could try that. But thank you, Fenris. Even just talking about it has made me feel better.” She stood up and kissed him on the cheek. “You came out here to tell me to come to bed, right?”

“I did. Are you coming?”

“In a minute. I just wanted to say a prayer for all of them.” Hawke folded the piece of parchment and tucked it in her pocket. “I can do that much.”

“I’ll join you.” Fenris took her hand and gave it a small squeeze. 

She looked down, but not before he caught a glimmer at the corner of her eye. “You don’t have to do that.”

“After Varania, I told you that I was alone. You reminded me that I was not. Now I am here to make sure you don’t forget that we have each other, no matter what other losses we have suffered.”

"Fenris..." She bowed her head further, still trying to hide her tears. 

He lifted her chin to meet her gaze before folding her into his arms. "Never be ashamed of your grief. I am here to share it."  



End file.
